Mosquitos are so rude, like who gave you permission to bite my ass?
i’m glad the shit that lives in the ocean lacks the ability to leave the ocean because most of it is scary as fuck
Wearing a black bra and black underwear cause you’re a fierce bitch
sorry i cant hang out with u today i have to catch up on my crying
My GPS lady sounds like she hasn’t been fucked in a long time
when attractive people say they are ugly
*throws flower petals at you* be my friend